


The End (Or is it?)

by KillerLaurel



Category: Leverage
Genre: Baby Fic, Established Relationship, F/M, Leverage International, M/M, Other, Post-Canon, Threesome - F/M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-06
Updated: 2016-10-06
Packaged: 2018-08-19 22:11:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 3,718
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8226356
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KillerLaurel/pseuds/KillerLaurel
Summary: Because I have an obsession with baby fic. Hardison, Parker, and Eliot have a baby.





	1. Chapter 1

“I want a baby.”  
Eliot and Alec turned to stare at their girlfriend.  
“Is this part of the con...?” Alec looked at the profile of their latest mark where it was projected on the screen.  
“No,” Parker smiled her scary smile. “I want us to have a baby.” Alec recognized that smile. That was the smile she gave him before pushing him off roofs.  
“I don’t know if that’s a good idea,” Eliot said. His eyes were wide. Alec recognized that look. It was a rare one. Eliot was spooked.  
“Why not?” Parker asked.  
“Well, for one,” Alec began. “We are cri-mi-nals, Parker. We’re wanted by every government agency in, like, the world.”  
“I use to kill people,” Eliot pointed out. “You jump off of buildings. Alec... he goes for days fighting orc battles with nothing to eat but orange soda and gummy frogs.”  
“Yeah but you don’t kill people anymore,” Parker countered. “I only jump if I have a rope or a parachute and it’s not like I would push my kid off a roof... well not until they were 10 at the least. Alec can teach the kid to fight orc battles. It’ll be like family bonding.”  
Parker was not the best versed in family, and both the men knew that, but neither had the heartlessness to point it out to her.  
“Let me get this straight, girl. You want to get preggers yourself or are you saying we should adopt?” Alec asked.  
“I wanna have a baby,” she reiterated. “Me, myself, you two. Sex.” she added as if it needed clarification.  
“Let us think about it, okay, Parker?” Eliot said softly. “This isn’t something you just jump into.”  
“You’ll really consider it?” she asked in a rare moment of vulnerability.  
“We will,” Alec assured her. “Now what’re your plans for this scumbag Gerald Hardy?” he waved a hand at the screen.  
“I’m thinking we destroy everything he holds dear and con him into wanting to give himself up to the police because the alternative, us, is ten times worse.”  
Eliot and Alec smiled their “Nate” smiles. Those were the creepy ones. They could get on board with that.


	2. Chapter 2

Eliot and Alec took some time to talk about the baby idea while they were waiting in Lucille for Parker to finish planting evidence. Alec muted the comms so they could hear her, but she couldn’t hear them. 

“So about the baby thing,” Alec started. Eliot made a face. “Nah, you don’t mean that, man. You’d make a great dad.”

“I use to kill people, Hardison! How in the world would I make a good dad?”

“Look man, that was years ago. You haven’t killed people in the whole time that I’ve known you.”

“But I have, Hardison,” he ground out. “I killed Moreau’s men in that warehouse with Nate and the Italian. But Nate swore he’d never tell you.”

“He didn’t. Why are you if you didn’t want us to know that bad?”

“Because you have to know what kind of person I am.”

“You know what, it don’t matter if you killed Moreau’s men. You said it yourself. Every one of them was worse than you. So it don’t matter to me, and I can guarantee you it don’t matter to Parker.”

“Dammit Hardison!”

“So about the baby. What do ya say now that you got that off your chest?”

“I just... I don’t know. What do you say?”

“It’s a big responsibility. For one, Parker’d be out of the game for at least a year. And we’d have to be a lot more careful ourselves. Our security would have to be airtight, we’d likely have to relocate every few years, plus we’d have to send the kid to school, preschool, kindergarten, elementary school, middle school, high school, college, graduate school, the works. And we’d have to accept that this kid can never have a normal life. This is at least an 18 year commitment plus 10 months of pregnancy-”

“Ten? I thought it was nine,” Eliot cut in.

“Nah man, it’s like 9 and a half if you wanna be exact, something to do with the missed period being two weeks after the time of conception. Nine and a half.”

“So you’ve got a good idea of what it means, but what do you  _ think _ ?” Eliot pushed.

“The truth?”   
“Yeah, man.”

“I like the idea of having a kid. I mean, I’d never have said a damn thing if Parker hadn’t cause that’s the kind of thing that would’ve spooked her... bit like it just spooked you.”

“And you really think I’d make a good dad?”

“Yeah man, like the Toy Job. Remember? Strict but fair?”

“That was fun,” Eliot grinned. 

“And you have to consider that you won’t be going it alone. You’d have me and Parker.”

“I already do,” Eliot pointed out, clearly more relaxed.

“Yeah, there’s the spirit!”

“Okay then.”

“Okay what?”

“Okay let’s have the damn baby.”

“Holla!” Alec tapped a few keys and the comms were back online just in time for Parker to speak up.

“Evidence planted, boys. I’m coming out undetected at the north side.”

“We’re having a baby, girl!” Alec crowed over comms.

“We are? Eliot said yes?”

“Yeah, I said yes.”

“You gonna be a mama for realz now, mama,” Alec grinned. “We’re at the north side now. Eliot, get ready to drive.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Eliot huffed as he climbed into the driver’s seat. There was a thud on the van roof.

“Go go go!” Parker shouted.

Eliot drove and Alec clutched his desk. Eliot’s driving was nearly as bad as Sophie’s.


	3. Chapter 3

They all had a lot of fun during the baby-making.   
Eliot had insisted on them all being screened for STI’s even though they’d been monogamously polyamorous for nearly two years. They all came back clean and Parker dragged them both to bed, grinning the whole way. Her smile was infectious and they joined in. Parker insisted they both finish in her so “you both have a fair chance at being baby daddy”. Neither of the men complained.  
Parker had been tracking her ovulation cycles for almost a year, she confessed to them after hours of very creative sex. Neither Alec nor Eliot knew what to say to that. She’d clearly put a lot of thought into this, been planning it for a while, and neither of them was stupid enough to question her surety. Parker was almost never unsure about her actions. In her line of work, doubt meant being slow, getting caught.  
“Hey,” she said as sweat cooled on their skin, tangled together as they were. Eliot reached down to pull the sheet over them.  
“Yeah?” Alec asked.  
“Thanks, you two.”  
“Uh...” Eliot gaped.  
“No problem, mama,” Hardison kissed her then leaned over her to kiss Eliot.


	4. Chapter 4

It took them three months, but finally Parker missed a period and all the little plastic sticks came back positive. Eliot and Alec had to look up how the damn things worked, saw their false positive rating and insisted Parker go to a proper doctor to have the tests run again. She went, simply because, and she would never tell them this, she was terrified of the possibility that she couldn’t get pregnant. Parker had been to a doctor probably twice in her life before this.  
“You’re gonna have to get use to this,” Eliot told her as they stood to either side of Parker in the exam room.  
“Yeah, mama, being pregnant means tests and doctors and ultrasounds all the live-long-day.”  
“I know,” she frowned. “But I don’t have to enjoy it, do I?”  
“No,” Eliot told her. “You don’t.”


	5. Chapter 5

“ELIOT! ALEC! BRING ME SOME GUMMY FROGS OR I’M GONNA PUKE!”  
“You know that doesn’t make sense right?” Eliot said, emerging from the kitchen with a plate full of grilled chicken and white rice. Parker made grabby hands at him until he handed it to her. She sat it on her frankly huge stomach like the baby bump was her own portable table, and grabbed the fork from Eliot.  
“Baby thanks you, papa,” Parker told him before digging in.  
“Might not be mine,” he pointed out. “We won’t know until it’s born.”  
“You’re still its papa. Alec can be “daddy”.”  
“I’m cool with that,” Eliot kissed her on the cheek.   
“Where is Alec?”  
“Probably baby shopping on Amazon or playing a game or some shit.”  
“Go get him.”  
“What for?”  
“I wanna talk baby names.”  
“ALEC HARDISON!” Eliot shouted. “Stop playing with your imaginary friends and come attend to your baby mama!”  
“I am not - ! They aren’t imaginary!” Alec yelled back, stomping downstairs from the loft. “And I was not playing a game.”  
“So what were you doing?” Parker asked around a mouthful of chewed food.  
“I was setting up a public wishlist on Amazon so strangers can buy us baby stuff.”  
“Why would strangers buy us stuff?” Eliot growled.   
“Hell if I know. I did send the link to some of our... friends.”  
“Which friends?” Parker asked.  
“Well, Tara for one. She told me to after that job last month. She’s super excited about the baby, go figure.”  
“Who else, Hardison?” Eliot crossed his arms.  
“Uh, well you know... people.”  
“Who!”  
“Quinn. And Maggie and Nate and Sophie. And then I got a friggin email from Sterling of all people. Somehow he found out and wanted to know if we needed like dippers or some shit so I sent him the link too.”  
“Sterling!”   
“If you keep making that face man it’s gonna stick. I think the man has a weakness for kids or something. Anyway, since he helped us out after we got the black book by letting Nate and Sophie go, he’s been suspiciously absent from being a pain in our asses. I waited for him to buy something off the list and sent a worm his way. I’ve got access to his phone now and as soon as he connects it to a computer, I’ll have that too.”  
“You’re using our baby as a way to spy on Sterling?” Parker asked, voice neutral.   
“Uh, yeah?”  
“Sweet. Eliot stop being mad now.”  
“Fine, but only because you said so.” Eliot growled.  
“Something wrong with your throat, man?” Alec teased.  
“Shut up.”  
“Whoa wait a hot minute. You made Parker food?”  
“Yeah, so?”  
“Anything left over?”


	6. Chapter 6

“FUCK FUCK FUUUUUUUUUUUCK!” Parker screamed as she pushed for what felt like the billionth time. Alec winced as she squeezed his hand, but Eliot didn’t, just made soothing sound that were really doing nothing for her.  
“One, two, push,” the nurse said.  
“FUCK YOU AND THE HORSE YOU RODE IN ON!”  
“One, two, push.”  
“SAY THAT AGAIN, I FUCKING DARE YOU!”  
“One, two, push, push, push!”  
Parker screamed and the nurse caught the baby, pulling it free of Parker and severing the umbilical cord.  
“It’s a girl!” the nurse said as she wrapped the child up and handed her to a panting Parker, who released the hands of her boys like they were on fire just to wrap them around their child.  
“She’s yours, man,” Eliot said, smiling like an idiot. He punched Alec gently in the arm, and Alec didn’t even notice, so focused he was on taking in the the child, their child. She had skin the color of coffee with just a dash of milk and wet curly black hair flat against her head and golden brown eyes.   
“What’s her name?” the nurse asked. “For the record?”  
“Anna,” Parker cooed.  
“Anna,” both Eliot and Alec echoed, sounding as if they’d been hit by a train.


	7. Chapter 7

“Did you name her after me!” Sophie’s voice was shrill. Parker frowned. “I mean, you remember? That I was Anna when we took down Dubenich the first time?”  
“Yeah?”  
“Yeah you remember or yeah you named her after me?”  
“Both,” Parker told her as if it was the simplest thing in the world.  
“Awwww. Nate!” Sophie had clearly placed her hand over the mic on her phone. “They named the baby after me!”  
“Which you?” Parker heard Nate ask faintly.  
“Anna,” Sophie told him.  
“Cute,” Nate responded absently.  
“Are you two on a con?” Parker asked. “Eliot come hold the phone while I feed Anna.” Eliot obligingly held the smartphone to Parker’s ear as she pulled down the front of her shirt and unclasped her front hooking bra so Anna could suckle.   
“No, we’re just-” Sophie began, but Nate shouted past her, “Yes!”  
“Who’re you conning?” Parker asked.  
“It’s just a little con, for fun and so we don’t get sloppy,” Sophie explained. “Nate also wants to see if he can pull one over on Interpol again. I think he’s addicted.”  
“What country are you in?”  
“France. It’s so lovely here.”  
“Where are they?” Eliot asked.  
“France,” Parker informed him.  
“Tell them to bring me back some truffles.”  
“Eliot said you should bring him back some truffles,” she relayed.  
“No,” Nate said.  
“Don’t be silly, Nate,” Sophie tsked. “Of course we’ll bring you something back. Did you get our baby gifts?”  
“You mean the little lock picks?”  
“What?” she heard Nate say. “I thought we were buying the kid toys and like dippers?”  
“Oh, Nate,” Sophie said in that voice she saved just for him. “When buying gifts, you buy things that someone is going to use.”  
“The kid won’t have the manual dexterity to use lock picks until she’s at least four,” he argued. “You’re going to go back on Amazon and buy the little girl some toys, puzzles and teddy bears and the like.”  
“Teddy bears! Don’t you remember the Toy Job? Teddy bears are deadly!” Parker exclaimed.  
“Okay so get her Baby Feels-A-Lot,” Nate said, sounding as if he were right next to the phone now. Sophie sighed.  
“You just don’t get it.” Sophie told him.  
“Out of the two of us, who has actually had a kid before?”  
“Yes, but that was before you became a thief. A thief’s kid is different.”  
“Ask them, when are they gonna have a kid?” Eliot whispered to Parker.  
“Eliot wants to know when you two are gonna have a kid,” Parker smirked at Eliot’s eye roll.  
“Us!” squawked Sophie.  
“That is a conversation for another day,” Nate told them. “Possibly another year.”  
“Another life, more likely,” Sophie huffed.  
“Don’t be too sure,” Parker told them. “Remember how in the beginning we said “no encores” and then look what happened to us.”  
“She’s right,” Eliot called into the phone. “Can you guys hang up now so I can start on dinner?”  
“Fine,” Sophie sighed. “Call us tomorrow. Actually no, tomorrow is the time with the thing in the place. We’ll call you.”


	8. Chapter 8

On Anna’s first birthday, all of Alec’s alarms went off in HQ and Eliot thundered down the stairs, yelling, “What’s going on!”  
Alec checked his surveillance cameras. “Sterling, front door, no visible back-up,” he reported.  
“What does he want?” Parker asked, gathering their child up out of her bouncy chair with dangling mobile and she headed towards the safe room.  
“Dunno. You lock up, we’ll figure it out,” Eliot told her. He headed down to the first floor much quieter than before and Alec kept an eye on them on his computer, just like he knew Parker was watching the monitor he’d hooked up in the safe room. Eliot opened the door and glared at Sterling.  
“What do you want?” he growled.  
“I was in town and thought I should bring this over personally.” Sterling held out an envelope, the kind greeting cards went in, and Alec zoomed in on it. It had their names written on it in fancy cursive.   
“What is it?” Eliot asked, making no move to accept it.   
“It’s from Maggie, if that makes it better. She didn’t have your current address, so I said I’d deliver it.”  
“Why’re you in town?” Eliot persisted.  
“I’m working with the FBI,” here Sterling made a face of disgust, “to catch an internationally wanted murderer. Now take the damn card so I can leave.”  
Eliot glanced up at the camera Alec was watching from. Alec tapped out a command and the little red light on the camera blinked three times. Eliot took the card and slammed the door in Sterling’s face. Even then, Eliot glared through the glass door until Sterling walked away before heading back upstairs.  
“You can come out now, mama,” Alec told Parker. “He’s gone.”  
“What’s in the envelope?” Parker asked, bouncing Anna on her hip. Eliot held it out for Alec to run a small glowing thingamabobber over it.   
“It’s clean. Open it.” Eliot slid his thumb under the flap and popped it open. He pulled out a white card and opened it.   
“What’s it say?” Parker asked impatiently.   
“We’re invited to a wedding,” Eliot was incredulous.  
“Whose wedding, man?” Alec asked.  
“Maggie and... Sterling? Ew man, that’s just nasty.” Eliot tossed the card to Alec, who caught it and read it out loud.  
“You are cordially invited to the nuptials of James Sterling and Margaret Collins.”  
“Does that mean there’s two Sterlings now?” Parker puzzled.   
“Three if you count Olivia,” Alec pointed out.  
“Are we counting Olivia?” she responded.  
“The girl is a world class genius who was spying for her father at age, what, twelve?” Eliot shrugged. “I think we’re counting her as a Sterling.”  
“So are we going?” Parker asked.  
“To the wedding?” Alec said, then in unison with Eliot, “No.”  
“Why not?”  
“It’s Sterling,” Eliot stressed but Parker was immune to Eliot-logic.  
“It’s also Maggie, and Maggie is our friend.”  
“She’s got a point,” Alec pointed out and Parker looked smug.  
“And,” Parker continued, “Sterling helped Nate escape INTERPOL on the black book job. AND he hasn’t tried, like really tried, to catch us since.”  
“You think we’re growing on him, babe?” Alec grinned.  
“Like a fungus,” she agreed. Eliot face-palmed.   
“Fine, but y’all have to agree that if I say we have to leave this damn wedding, we all leave, without question or argument.”  
“Agreed,” Parker and Alec told him.


	9. Chapter 9

Contrary to Eliot’s (and secretly Alec and Parker’s) expectations, the wedding was not a giant mouse trap full of INTERPOL and who know what else. Nate and Sophie were there, as well as an array of family, Olivia included, that eyed the trio with suspicion, not because they looked like criminals, no all three wore appropriate attire, but because they simply couldn’t understand which one of them was Parker’s boyfriend, and if they knew the truth they’d probably be scandalized. (Except for Aunt Ella, they found out later, who was living quite happily with two girlfriends and a husband on the side. Who knew Sterling had such relations).  
Maggie’s dress was spectacular for all that it was understated, a slim fitting affair of off white lace with a high neck and long sleeves. Out of the two men that framed Parker in the third row, only Alec noticed the way Parker’s eyes lit up when Maggie walked down the aisle. He tried to signal to Eliot without disturbing the wedding, but resigned himself to the arduous task of trying to convince the hitter that, yes, Parker did get dewy eyed when the pair said their vows and, no, it was not just his imagination, though God knows he’d often thought about marrying his partners. But Alec could be tactful when he needed to be, and just like the baby idea, he knew it had to come from either Eliot or Parker or both of them would spook like a skittish horse confronted with a snake.   
Never in his life before Leverage had Alec suspected he would become the least skittish person he worked with. For years he’d run from one thrill to the next, usually running away from potential dangers, just like during the Nigerian Job when Nate had said to use him as bait. Now look at him. In a committed relationship with people even more broken than him and a baby whose diapers were going to need changing soon by the scrunched up look on Anna’s face.   
“Mama,” he whispered in Parker’s ear as he wrapped his hands around their daughter. “Our girl needs changing.” Parker nodded, trusting Alec to know what needed to be done to maintain a normal appearance in a crowd of normal people, and Alec slipped out the side of the wedding tent as Sterling and Mrs Sterling walked down the aisle together and people clapped and cried.  
Alec didn’t know how to dance. He had worse than two left feet, more like three left hands and a right foot all tangled together. So he sat at their assigned table with Anna while Eliot taught Parker a simple waltz on the floor, and Parker amused herself by picking the pockets of people they bumped into. Nate and Sophie had arrived late, since their plane was delayed in Singapore, but now looked disgustingly happy as Sophie laid her head on Nate’s shoulder and they swayed in one spot.  
Eliot cast a look over his shoulder at Alec to be sure his man was occupied with Anna and turned back to Parker. “He’s never going to ask, you know.”  
“Ask what?” Parker looked puzzled.  
“Ask us to marry him.”  
“We can’t marry him, not together,” Parker pointed out, still confused.  
“Maybe not legally. But we could have a ceremony, rings.” Before Parker could protest that a ring would screw up her lift, he added, “You could wear yours around your neck. I could too, so I don’t break my finger the first time I punch someone and Alec would likely do the same because of his typing. But we could still have them. He wants it, can’t you see that?”  
“I wasn’t sure,” Parker confessed. “I’m still no good at people.”  
“But you’re good with us.”  
“You’re not just people.”  
“So what I wanted to say was, he’s never going to ask because he doesn’t want to scare us off. He thinks he’s the most normal one out of us, but even he can’t see how scared he is of scaring us off.”  
“So we have to ask him?”  
“If that’s what you want. It has to be all three of us wanting it or there’s no point.”  
“Like Anna.”  
“Yes. Like our girl.”  
“Okay.”  
“Okay?”  
“Let’s ask him. Together.”  
“When?”  
“Tonight.”


End file.
